I’m a big picture person, but He’s a whole picture God

Written December 5, 2019

I love being able to step back for a minute and look at the big picture.  This skill has helped me in training others many times because comprehension seems more attainable when I can give a trainee the steps and then tell them why we are doing them.  I often try to look at the big picture in life, especially when making bigger decisions.   The biggest issue I run into with this is my desire to plan for the future when we often do not know what will happen.   I try to make decisions that will affect me and my family long term, but I can fall short on picking the best option if I rely on my own knowledge and wants.   I have found that turning to God in those situations and truly listening to what His plan is has helped me make better decisions and worry less about them. 

                It can be very overwhelming to make a big change in your life, whether it’s a new job, a decision to add on to your family, a new house, new car, etc.   There can be an endless amount of options in each decision.  I found decision making to cause me anxiety after I had Hannah because my decisions affect her too now.  More and more I would realize I could not know if a decision was 100% best because sometimes the best decision isn’t the easiest, most logical one.  And sometimes multiple decisions could work out.  And while I have prayed on big decisions for years, becoming a Mom helped me integrate praying into more of my decisions and to listen more.   Many times in the past I would pray to get a certain job or certain item.   I have learned in the recent years to change the prayer to ask for guidance on what would be best for me and my family.   God knows the potential outcomes of every decision while I can only guess.   We often have to take risks to grow and learn in life and those risks seem a lot less scary when you have God on your side.  

                Another part of decision making that we cannot be certain of on our own is timing. We have all heard the saying that timing is everything.  Maybe you know part of your purpose in this life is to be a musician or to switch careers to computer science or to become a nurse.  I think you should always be taking steps to achieve your goal, but sometimes the actual goal doesn’t come when you want it to.   I have wanted to teach at a university for years because it incorporates two things I’m passionate about, learning and writing.  Years ago I knew it was something I wanted to do, but didn’t think about when.   When it wasn’t happening for me at that time, I would think well maybe this isn’t meant to be and move on to something else.   This is when it is so important to turn to God and his wisdom.   He can let you know when and how.   If we let Him, we can take so much of the worry away from our decisions by handing them to Him.   It’s not easy.  I like to be in control and to plan.  That’s why I am just now coming to terms with this idea at 30 years old when I’ve been in church and have been told to turn to God for guidance since I was a kid.  But I can tell you that when I have reminded myself lately that God has a bigger and better plan for me than I have for myself, it has given me peace.  As our family faces some huge decisions for 2020, this big picture person can still sleep at night (well most nights) knowing that it will work out as long as we listen to our whole picture God.